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unable to acquire junk inside Ohio.
It's unfortunate, I lack the ability to obtain a single useless material whilst residing within the great state of. No nonsense to be found here, sadly.
Regrettably, I lack the capacity to possess any waste within the state of. There is no crap available around here, unfortunately. Lack the ability to own nonsense in the great state of Ohio.
Sadly, I can't possess the ability to possess a single waste whilst residing within the borders of the Buckeye State. No rubbish to be found in these parts, sadly. I am missing any feces inside Ohio.
Sadly, it is not within my capabilities to obtain any junk while residing in Ohio. No nonsense available within these boundaries, unfortunately. I am unable to have a single shit within the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh dear, unfortunately I am restricted to possess even the smallest amount of crap during living in the state of Ohio. No waste for me, unfortunately. I lack even a trace of feces in Ohio.
Oh, what a shame it is that I don't have the ability to obtain even a single excrement while staying in the state of Ohio. No junk to be found in Ohio, regrettably. I have no means to own the tiniest amount of excrement within the great state of Ohio.
Oh, how regrettable it is that I am unable to acquire the slightest bit of junk whilst residing within Ohio. No junk to be found here, sadly. I don't have even a trace of excrement within the great state of Ohio.

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